Oelkers' Odyssey

A Story

2012-01-15T14:18:00.001-06:00

Once upon a time, a very long time ago, there was a stubborn princess who was given a very great gift. The year was 1980, "Princess" Jan had been married for 2 years. She had one beautiful daughter and was expecting another child. Jan's first husband, Dan the Frog Prince, had spent the last year investigating various religions and Jan had just about decided that all religions were a waste of time. The little family had just moved into a tiny home on Bell Street when Dan saw two young men in dark suits walking down the street. Dan invited the valiant young Saturday's Warriors into the little home where they began to tell a lovely story of redemption and hope. The young men were missionaries for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. They taught Dan about a prophet of God who restored the true gospel. They taught him about where we came from and where we are going, about the Father's plan for how we can become like Him and be able to return to Him. The stubborn princess was angry to have Dan bringing a new world of ideas and expectations into their home so she told the young men she would not listen to them. Then whenever they came to the tiny castle she pretended to stay away but busied herself in the next room where she could listen to the warriors speak. The stubborn princess knew in her heart that they were speaking the truth but she did not want to change their whole lives. When the young men told the story of the family becoming a family for all of eternity she knew that she could lose her precious children if she did not soften her heart. The princess eventually joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and has been listening ever since. She is still stubborn though.

Mother's Day

2011-05-08T18:40:00.001-05:00

I'm missing out on some great blessings by not visiting this blog more often. Today is Mother's Day, once again and I've had a very nice day despite my tendency to feel sorry for myself on Mother's Day. My children are all "elsewhere". Anna and Stan have moved to Tempe, AZ, Brenda, Derek and Daevius have moved to Boulder, UT, and Bill, Stephanie, Ben & Elodie are still in Provo, UT. No kids in my immediate vicinity to bring me an inedible breakfast in bed and invade my house for the day - SO I was feeling sorry for myself. My sweet son (actually I suspect it was my daughter-in-law) sent me a mug with pictures of my grandchildren all over it. My husband cooked dinner, and Bill called me and we talked for an hour. I took a nap in the afternoon. Now I'm just hanging out for the rest of the day. I called my moms yesterday, and everyone seems to be doing okay. Life is good.

Now for a few of my thoughts, ramblings, etc about mothers. The Smith's spoke in church today on the subject of mothers. I really enjoyed their messages. It had me thinking (as the talks on Mother's Day usually do) about what kind of mother I have been and the mother's I have had in my life. I remember wanting to be the best mother EVER. (Not exactly an original goal - but worthy, I think) I wasn't. Every mother has things they would do differently if given the chance. Every mother looks back at their own maternal parent with a mixture of critique and emulation and tries to choose the best of what she got and improve on the things that maybe did not go so well. The trouble is that the critique portion of the program is taken on by an inexperienced blockhead. My own mother had a boatload (sure glad I cleaned that up) of challenges when she was parenting me and I could probably spend some time talking about what went wrong but as I look back at my own successes and failures, I'm not sure the beam has been removed from my own eye enough to clearly see the mote in my mom's. Here are the things my mother has done exceptionally well for me. She convinced me that I was smart and capable. She taught me that if I wanted to do something I would be able to do it - but I might have to be willing to get there on my own. She showed me that people can fall down and make mistakes and can pick their lives up and move on. Recently, my mother told me she was proud of the things I have accomplished. What she missed is that the pure stubborn strength that has gotten me here (my hubby grumbles about my "Danish streak") really did come from her. I love my mom, and I'm grateful for the things I have learned about love and humility as well as perseverance from her. Thanks Mom.

Next up- President's Day

2011-02-19T13:39:00.000-06:00

   It seems that it requires an additional day off work for me to get around to blogging again. I'm currently beginning a 3 day weekend. I stripped the beds, aired out the blankets, swept the floors, shook the rugs, and am on my 3rd load of laundry! I still have a long list of things I need to get done this weekend but they will keep while I check in with myself (and anyone else who chooses to read this- thanks Nicole and Kristen).

A few notable events:

   Monte was released from the Young Men's presidency so we had one last Young Men's leadership Christmas dinner party. Monte made his famous prime rib, we played games, laughed a lot, and basically gave closure to an era in our lives. I can't help pausing to reminisce about some of the highlights. Watching my husband lead, guide, teach, and love (I know it's not manly to admit it) those young men taught me a lot about who he really is. I have a lasting image in my mind of him standing at the doors of the chapel overseeing the passing of the sacrament. He is proud of the young men who passed through our lives over the past 8 years. They went camping together, in our backyard, to scout camps, and to the boundary waters. They camped in cold weather as well as warm and built many bonfires in the firepit on our property. They went paintballing, skiing, sledding, hiking, canoeing, and bowling. And they served others together with Monte modeling how that is done. The young men have worked for and with Monte and we have watched them serve missions and start families with a sense of having contributed to the lives of some exceptional men.

We spent a weekend in Salt Lake:

   At the end of January, Monte went to Salt Lake for several days to paint for an old family friend. I took a day off work and joined him on Friday. I arrived just in time to attend an IEP meeting for my grandson. Derek, Brenda's husband, picked me up from the airport and we went from there to the meeting. It was an experience to be "on the other side of the table" as it were. I think the meeting went pretty well but it is especially difficult to have strong opinions about how his services should be provided and not have any real power to be sure that it happens that way. They say doctors make the worst patients. I think sped teachers are probably the worst people to have as parents or grandparents of sped students. I try not to be "that kind" of a grandma but can't help expressing my opinions.
   After the meeting we had dinner at P.F. Chang's (my absolute fave) It is wholly inadequate to say "it was really fun". My general response is to want to look into my children's eyes and see how they are really doing, hug my grandchildren until they squeak and hog the baby. All of these things I did with relish. My parents all look older but basically well. My children look well (sort of), happy, and overwhelmed with their busy lives. My grandchildren are all the most beautiful, smartest, funniest children ever - all because of me. My mom tried to take credit while we were at dinner. I just smiled and didn't correct her;)

Left to right, Xavey, Dad, Diane, Derek at PF Chang's

The next day Monte took Xavey and Daevius to breakfast at Denny's. Daevius let his parents and I come along as well. Daevius is especially fond of chocolate chip pancakes and bacon - Grandpa is fond of watching how much Daevius loves to go to breakfast.

Monte & ElodieVae

Daevius and Monte at Denny's

Brenda and ElodieVae

Derek and Brenda

After breakfast Monte and the kids went swimming at the hotel while Grandma and the parents (who all had colds) sat beside the pool and visited.

Grandpa and the kids - Splash!!

Ben wouldn't leave the steps but had a good time all the same.

Okay, when's lunch?

Bill wasn't feeling too well. Xavey's hat looks good though.

After swimming we picked up some Tai food and went to Bill and Stephanie's house. While the younger kids napped we ate curry and talked and played Wii. Xavey was especially good at the hula hoop.

Daevius with Grandma's I-touch

Xavey and her hat.

Holiday Update 3

2010-12-26T21:33:00.001-06:00

Finally – Christmas. I say it every year – that Christmas has just snuck up on me – but it was especially bad this year. We were unable to go to Utah to spend it with our children so I did not have the luxury of knowing I will have a shopping day before and no need to plan ahead so gifts could be mailed. I literally shopped on Christmas Eve. I sent digital gift cards, and then made some phone calls. (I know I’m SO bad) I vow, here and now, to do a better job next year. The thing is, despite the opportunity for this year to be depressing (since my heart is in Utah with the grandkids) it really wasn’t. My sister-in-law, Linda, came to dinner on Christmas Eve. We had a pleasant evening visiting. I slept in yesterday morning, then we puttered around together for the morning. We opened some gifts. Santa gave Monte a new mailbox! I’m SO excited about that. He gave me a Star Trek version of Scene It. And Bill & Stephanie gave me a boxed set of Star Trek movies!! He swears he and Santa were not in cahoots. Then we went and sat in the dark, ate popcorn, drank a bladder buster of soda and saw the movie True Grit. It was a good movie. I liked it as much as the original with John Wayne and that’s saying something. After that we went to lunch at Linda’s house and visited with Linda and Emmie and Bradley and Anna & Jeff. We finished off with a quiet evening at home. Great stuff.

Holiday Update 2

2010-12-26T21:31:00.000-06:00

The next event of note was our annual Gingerbread Party. I’ll preface this report with a brief review of what precipitated this party in the first place. One of the traditions I had while my children were growing up was making gingerbread houses with them and (sometimes) their friends. When Monte and I moved to Minnesota our daughters were already in college in Utah and their lives were well underway. Bill was entering high school. I felt distinctly obsolete and I went through a depression that took me a several years to actually get a handle on. By that time, Bill had finished high school and gone on a Mission. I had fallen into a serious apathy about Christmas, I kept saying I hated it. I remember being a real killjoy – just thinking about it makes me sad. I went through the motions, more or less, I remembered “the reason for the season” just fine; but I could not seem to find the cheer. One afternoon I realized that what I was REALLY missing about Christmas was the traditions I’d observed with my children. That was what inspired the Annual Gingerbread Party. My intention is to have a party that is specifically for the children in the family. I want them to get to know their Auntie Jan and to have memories of spicy gingerbread and creative expression in connection with Auntie Jan’s house. Usually Wyatt and Willa (my niece and nephew who live next door) help me do the baking but I’ve been so busy this year that I let it get too late to be able to work around all our schedules, so I baked 14 houses. I like big houses so that there is plenty of “scope for the imagination” when decorating. This year we really had a blast. We made some Christmas tree ornaments as the children arrived. Then we had hot dogs and mac & cheese for lunch and decorated the houses after that. Bill, Stephanie, Ben, & Elodie joined us in a video conference on the computer. I had sent the gingerbread house pieces to Bill so he could put the together and they would have a house to decorate. It was SO much fun to listen while everyone caught up with each other. The kids had so much fun and were really well behaved. What a great family we have. NO more depression at Christmas. I do miss my children and especially my grandchildren at this time of year, but I love my little nieces and nephews and especially my sisters-in-law so much. I’ve embedded the photo album containing pics of this party into the slideshow in this blog.

Holiday Update

2010-12-26T20:03:00.000-06:00

Okay, here we go. At Thanksgiving Monte and I went to Flower Mound, Texas to spend it with Monte’s brother, Scott, and his family. We had Thanksgiving dinner with Scott & Sue, their daughter Megan and her husband Mark, their sons Myles, Marshall, and Marc, and some family friends. Dinner was great. Scott usually does the turkey but he had recently had surgery on his shoulder so he “instructed” Marshall in how to stuff the turkey and put it in the oven. Then Sue and I (and other members of the family) cooked a lineup of really tasty things. The boys watched football (of course) and Scott napped – his pain meds were pretty effective. Sue’s friend Sharon had provided a variety of pies so, when we were capable of eating again, we engaged in a sort of taste test. Sharon repeatedly declaring that they weren’t any good. In a roomful of men and teenage boys the pie was declared eminently edible, and they did – well we all did.

The next day we went to the temple. Marshall will be leaving on his mission to Ontario, Canada in January and needed to receive his endowments. What a great honor it was to be able to be there for that event with him. Marshall is a valiant young man, an excellent example of what it means to belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We topped off the trip by having a celebratory dinner at a Mexican restaurant where we consumed multiple baskets of chips and salsa, some pretty great Mexican food, and celebrated Marshall’s accomplishment along with celebrating his birthday (it was also Scott’s birthday!) Whew!

October Update Revisited

2010-10-30T16:17:00.001-05:00

Halloween! I like this holiday. I like the time of year, with its brisk weather. I like mildly scary stuff (not the awful stuff). I LOVE costumes, although I haven't dressed up now for several years. I LOVE seeing the kids in their costumes, all excited to try out a new persona for a few hours. I get a big kick out of watching to see what kids choose to dress up as. Remember when that was the toughest decision you had to make? My school had a family Halloween dance put on by the PTO. I carved a couple of Jack-o-lanterns and volunteered to help. It was so much fun but I couldn't stay. I went out to my car to get my costume and discovered that my car wouldn't start. My co-worker offered to jump start it for me but she was leaving so I figured I'd better take her up on it and and just get home. Last weekend, Monte took me to a Gophers game at the new TCF stadium on the University of Minnesota Campus. Anna and Jeff came with us. It was really pleasant. The weather had been rainy and cold all week and the forecast said it would rain and be in the 50s. I dressed warm, so of course I was dressed too warm. The sun came out and it was beautiful! The game was fun to watch - despite the fact that the Gophers lost. I ate hot dogs and popcorn and pop - woo hoo! After the game we went out for curry. We discovered that Anna does NOT like curry but Jeff just may. Monte, on the other hand was not impressed with the restaurant I picked. Ah well, my curry was great. I enjoyed spending time with my husband and brother and sister in law.

October Update

2010-10-17T19:57:00.000-05:00

I really do want to write more regularly but I'll have to settle for what I can get at this point. First, a brief tribute to my first born. Yesterday was her birthday. She's 32! I can't believe it.

This is my Anna, Anna-banana-sketti to her childhood friends. She is smart and beautiful and loving. She is loyal to a fault. Anna is the caretaker of the family. She's the one I call when I'm worried about one of her siblings because she generally already knows what is up with them. Anna walked at 9 months old and could read before she entered kindergarten. I couldn't seem to give her information fast enough. One of my favorite stories about my little Anna is about her first day of Kindergarten. Her new Kindergarten teacher found her standing and staring at a bulletin board. Of course her teacher asked her if she wanted it read to her. Anna's response "No I've already read it. Can I read it to you?" Now Anna is a college graduate, working in a research lab. She and Stan will be moving to Tempe, Arizona in the next couple of weeks. She hand her sister have lived in Salt Lake City since we all moved there together in 1991. They have been really close so I'm wondering how they will do after they move apart from each other.

My job has been really tough this fall. I still love it but I can't seem to get my head above water and I hate the feeling. I have worked evenings and weekends, gone to work early, and stayed late every day since the beginning of school. Yesterday, I got up early and gathered up all of the mending in my closet and settled in at my sewing machine. After that I did all our laundry, baked some cookies, and went grocery shopping with my hubby. I intended to get some school paperwork done tonight but decided to blog instead. It feels great. My sweet husband gave me a blessing today and I think I'm going to find my balance now.

My Summer Fun

2010-08-22T21:45:00.000-05:00

Well, I've been having a great time with my summer. I dragged out the boxes of pictures of my children that I've neglected for 30 years and have been sorting through them. I'm having a blast. I noticed, however, that I have to be careful about how long I spend going through them. I tend to get melancholy. I start to miss my children so much, and then I start to think about things "I wish I'd done differently". Not productive, let me tell you. The best part of the whole thing is that I've gone to a couple of crops at Archivers and done a few scrapbook pages AND I've scanned a bunch of pictures and posted them to an online file. I feel so good about this. It means that the pictures are safe from destruction, (a lot of pictures were lost in the fire in '91) and it provides a chance for my kids to enjoy them. They certainly haven't done anyone any good sitting in those boxes. Bill and Stephanie taught me how to do a video conference so we've been able to do a couple of those and visit with my grandbabies. Seriously fun. Technology ROCKS! Anyway. the other thing I've been doing with my summer is tending my garden and canning the proceeds. The garden is a mess the weeds have completely taken over the herb sections and the pumpkins are literally growing right through the gate and across the lawn! Monte keeps saying "just cut it back, we only need ONE pumpkin anyway. Far too late for that and I'm fascinated by the thing. It's really amazing. The cucumbers and zucchini are producing well, too.

It's About Time to Update

2010-08-08T20:32:00.002-05:00

  I can't believe the last update I wrote was in May. I told myself I'd have more time in the summer but the list of things I need to get done this summer is indeed long.
  First, at the end of the school year Anoka-Hennepin School District closed 7 elementary schools. I was blessed (and darn lucky) to be retained in the same school I've worked at for the past 6 years. It did not mean, however, that we got off without upheaval. The second to last day of school was officially "moving day". If you were not personally moving into or out of a classroom you were assigned to go help someone who was. I had to move out of my classroom a week before that so that my classroom could undergo renovation to make it functional for the new Autism program moving in. On moving day I was required to move out of the temporary spot I'd gone to and into my "new" room for next year. The next day I spent the whole day trying to organize sped files that had been moved and discussing placement for sped kids for the coming year.
  The day after the last day of school I got on a plane for Salt Lake City. My newest grandaughter, Elodie Vae Oelkers, had been born and I couldn't wait to hold her!

It was a really brief visit but lots of fun. We had a cookout at Anna and Stan's house and a potluck at Bill & Stephanie's, went to a movie with Mom, Derek, Xavey, and Daevius, and even had a visit at Dad & Diane's. I took lots of pictures which I have posted in my Mobile Me gallery. http://gallery.me.com/joelkers

Next, I taught summer school. I had 11 4th graders (10 boys and 1 girl) and was part of a pilot program using a specified curriculum. We worked really hard, but the kids were great fun. They were each so unique. I had one who hardly said a word until week three, then he decided I was okay and spent the next 3 weeks telling me all about himself. Then I had 2 who talked nonstop about anything and everything that was running through their heads. One of them was interested in Transformers so I got to hear all about "his universe" and how he doesn't really belong in this universe anyway. He did tell me, however, that I was the "Queen of this Universe" and he would do what I told him. (Which he mostly did, if given sufficient advance warning that I was going to expect something. The girl loved crafts of all kinds. She showed up for the first time the day before the 4th of July weekend and was REALLY good at the beadie buddy we were making for the occasion. She finished hers in record time and was able to help some of her classmates with theirs. We also had some additional visitors during our time at school.

This family of ducks was the third one to be moved out of the central courtyard. They were so cute!

A couple of days before the 4th of July, Scott and Sue and their son Marc came to stay. They brought Scott's friend Russ with them and the men did the usual round of golfing while Sue and I had a truly grand time making a large and complicated cake for the 4th of July Party. The cake was a hit and the party was a blast even if it did rain. It was a riot to watch all of the kids playing in the pools and on the slip and slid in the rain. The potato chips were all soggy, though.

Sue and my castle creation. Everything is edible except the foil flags on top and some foil in the top of the turrets.

My friend (and sister) Sue hard at work.

Daughters

2010-05-30T17:59:00.000-05:00

My daughter, Brenda, turned 30 on Monday. This is an event that gives a mother pause under any circumstances but this was also the day I received the news that one of my students was in the hospital and not expected to recover. The two events should not necessarily be linked but in my head they most definitely were. I'm so incredibly grateful for 3 decades of association with my sweet Brenda. Let me tell you a little about her. When my first child was born I loved her so intensely that I couldn't imagine ever having as much love for anyone else. I was actually worried when I discovered I was expecting again that I might not love this child as much. So I chose to name her Brenda, "the warrior". Brenda was named this because I knew in my bones that she would have to be able to advocate for herself. I also chose the name in honor of my older sister (also Brenda) who has always been my advocate. Brenda is the original "tough chick". Like her mother she is a study in opposites. As a child she was my little princess all in pink, lace, and rhinestones and the first one to eat the bug or jump in the pool. As an adult she is a tree hugging, vegetarian, Air Force Reserve soldier girl, mom. I'm proud of my baby. Not the kind of pride spoken of in the scriptures where I take any credit for or claim any glory in connection to the person Brenda has become; but the heart full of joy kind of pride I feel as I have watched this unique person define who and what she wants to be. She has not made all of her decisions in the directions I would have her but she always, always takes responsibility for her own choices. Brenda is loving, smart, and constant. She throws herself completely into every responsibility she accepts. My son in law and grandchildren are lucky to have her. (I suppose I could be biased).
Now for the rest of this observation. My student passed away on Thursday. She will be buried next Saturday - on her 7th birthday. She was born with Cerebral Palsy and has been in discomfort, if not outright pain all of her life. Her parents will not know the joys I've experienced as Brenda's mother. Yet their expressed desire for her memorial service is for us to celebrate their precious daughter's brief life. We are each given very different tasks to accomplish in our time on earth. Could it be that Brenda and I have so very much more to learn than my little student did that her mission on this earth could be accomplished in a mere 7 years? Either way, I'm grateful for having known her, too.

A State of Well Being

2010-05-19T20:55:00.000-05:00

I sleep with someone who likes to watch television at night, all night. I often wake to some interesting infomercials... This morning's infomercial was all about how to have "rock hard abs". Never a good wake up call, but it did have an effect. After I turned off the unrealistic, unproven promises that insult my intelligence even as they offend my self-image I lay quietly thinking about how much I really need to get my body moving again. When my arthritis was diagnosed I could barely move enough to get to and from the daily activities that are required of me. Everyone told me that exercising would make it better but every time I tried I'd have another flare up and spend a day or 2 in bed (this was something far beyond sore muscles) and then require higher doses of steroids to get moving again. Which the doctor warned me is a bad thing. So I got far, far out of the habit of getting moving. Anyway, in January the doc increased my medication, again, and as I was pondering the exercise situation this morning I realized that I have not had even one flare up this winter. SO, that makes it time. Two years ago I took a class at the YMCA that was a combination of yoga, tai chi, and pilates. I loved it...and hated it. I loved the low impact, stretching, and whole body-mind approach. I hated being part of a class (oooh people watching) when my body is so well cushioned and inflexible that I was unable to do most of the routines and some of it was SERIOUSLY painful on the joints. So guess what? Netflix has a yoga video called "Healing Yoga" I got out of bed this morning and did the whole routine! This brings me to the title of today's blog. This was a really wimpy routine. I could do ALL of it and it felt great. Nothing hurt and I went to work feeling energized instead of wiped out. I even felt like I could think more clearly. I can't wait to do it again tomorrow morning. Okay, I realize I'm rambling and I feel a little sheepish about this whole entry but I'm posting it anyway. My purpose is to record the events of my life. This feels like an event that I'd like to preserve.

Softball Season revisited

2010-05-12T07:45:00.001-05:00

Okay, last Monday Monte's team played their third game - in the rain. I missed that one. I guess I'm not quite that dedicated. They won though ;)

Mothers, Choices, Mother Eve

2010-05-08T15:33:00.001-05:00

A few days ago we had some people at our house who asked some great questions about Adam and Eve and the Garden of Eden. Here is my take on this particular story. I feel it is especially appropriate today in honor of Mother’s Day. I believe, and the scriptures tell us, that in the Garden of Eden Adam and Eve were given a choice. They were warned not to eat the fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil but they were also told to start a family. They could not have it both ways. I used to ask my Seminary students if they were “set up to fail”. No, here is the thing. All parents know that sometimes our children will have to make hard choices. They will have to choose between things that are neither the wrong choice nor the right choice, simply a choice. No parent wants his children to experience pain and failure, but no parent wants her children to remain “immature” for eternity. He had to give Adam and Eve a choice. Adam’s choice, at first, was to follow God’s advice not to eat the fruit, stay safe in this pleasant place. Eve made the hard choice, she took the biggest risk. Mother Eve chose pain, and strife, and hard work, and death so that all men might live. Eve risked having Adam choose other than he did, he still had agency. Sometimes this story is told with the perspective that Eve committed a “terrible sin” and then led Adam astray if that is so, then the lives we all have on this earth are a consequence of that sin. It makes it sound like life is a punishment. This is just not so. Our lives on this earth are the greatest gift our Father in Heaven could offer us. This is our opportunity to become like Him and our Savior, Jesus Christ, completed the plan. Our Father knew the end from the beginning but he also knew the the key would be in the choice.

Today, I want to express my gratitude to every mother for making the hard choices. Being a mother is really hard work. It is painful (both emotionally and physically) and often thankless but it comes with an equal measure of joy. Happy Mother's Day.

Talent Show

2010-04-30T06:48:00.000-05:00

Madison had its talent show last night and of course the school was able to see the show during the afternoon. Second grade Janie (not her name) stood in front of 500 students and 60 plus adults dressed in her Little Orphan Annie dress. Her mother had to hold her up but she belted out "Tomorrow". She knew every word. Her audience cheered and her teachers wept. Janie attends Madison in the centerbase program. She has Downs Syndrome and is Severely Multiply Impaired. Sure, her performance wasn't ready for "American Idol" but I was far more entertained than I've ever been watching that program. There was an amazing range of talent in our little school. What a lovely memory.

Softball Season

2010-04-27T09:20:00.001-05:00

Monte's softball team had their first game of the season last night. They won - by a lot. If I weren't a lady I'd phrase it another way. In the past few years I have neglected these games. I've had lots of excuses but this year I'm determined to attend most of them. It was really fun to sit in the fresh air and visit with all of the fans. It is a "church" league, meaning all of the teams are from a different church. This makes for fun discussions in the spectator section because nobody gets so competitive that it overrides their Christlike attitude (usually). I could sit and groan with the other side's fans when our team scored their 20th run, and as my husband threw the ball to first base for a really pretty double play I could say "that one's my hubby" without fear of getting my ears boxed. It was fun - more to follow.

End of the 09/10 school year.

2010-04-25T18:54:00.000-05:00

The end of the year is rolling in sorta like a tsunami. Our district is closing 7 (or is it 8) schools at the end of the school year. My school isn't one of them but it means staffing shakups district wide. Our principal is being replaced by someone with more seniority. It is never comfortable when your supervisor is being replaced with an unknown. You may remember a few posts ago, I mentioned what a superior principal this woman is. I will greatly miss working with her. There was also a real possibility that I might be replaced by someone with more seniority. The staffing announcements came out on Thursday and I will still be working at Madison. Hooray! (I think) No really, I've been lucky to work at Madison for the past 6 years. I will be back in my previous position as the EBD teacher half time and the Sped Department Lead the other half. AND I will be teaching summer school at Madison this year which puts me closer to home than the past 3 years. So most of the news is good. My son and his wife are having a baby this summer and I'm beginning to plot ways to get to Utah this summer to see the new baby. (For more info see their blog "Why Not") Monte has gone back to school. He has had his nose in his books since January. I'm so proud! Anna and Stan are talking about moving to Arizona (or maybe Florida?) I lost track, but there will most certainly be a move in their future. Brenda had an emergency surgery in March (if you don't already know for what you'll have to ask her yourself. She thinks blogging and facebook are far too public as it is so I'll respect her privacy - a little) She's almost as tough as she thinks she is, though, and seems to have healed up well. So, I'm really starting to look forward to summer coming, getting ready for it is the tsunami part I'm treading water as the wave curls me under. Maybe my baby brother will teach me to surf!

Spring has sprung and so have I

2010-03-16T06:22:00.000-05:00

It was 60 degrees yesterday! There is no longer a huge slab of ice covering my driveway. I can see green shoots peeking through the detritus on the lawn. Summer school applications were due last week. Kindergarten observations and registration, pink slips for untenured teachers, 5th grade transition meetings, and last chance for special education evaluations. Spring cleaning in all it's many forms rears its ungainly head. At home and at school the task is screaming for attention. Pack it up, purge it out, plant it, or prune it. I LOVE SPRING.

Good week so far.

2010-02-02T18:36:00.004-06:00

I'm having a pretty good week so far. I almost hate to say it, it's like "tempting the evil eye" but there it is. We had conferences last night. I was dreading it for a variety of reasons but the main one was that I had a parent who vehemently wanted to retain their kindergartner for a second year in kindergarten. Minnesota school districts, in fact most school districts in this country, simply don't retain a student who is already identified as disabled - it really is counter productive. It is like using a general ed approach to address a special ed need. On top of that, the research shows that there are very few situations in which retention of any student is an effective way to "help them" progress. I had already had several tentative discussions with these parents to that effect but at the bottom it is up to the school Principal to make the final decision. I knew what she was going to say and was NOT looking forward to these parents' certain disappointment. Our school Principal is awesome! She was so gentle but immovable. It was an education to watch. The discussion lasted over half an hour but by morning the dad had left us all a message that he understood what we were trying to tell him and he agreed after all. And he thanked us for taking the time to talk it through with him!! Since he is an attorney I was pretty impressed by this message. I was ready for another round.

Today the snow made me 10 minutes late for a Child Study meeting (I'm the Child Study Chairperson) and the meeting was in progress when I got to school so I had to scramble to get my part put together and present it. By the time I was finished with that I had to teach a social skills lesson. Then I had to cover a class for a teacher who had to go to another building for a transition meeting. When that was done I had to leave to attend a meeting at the Staff Development Center. I had to leave that meeting 45 minutes early in order to be back at Madison for an IEP meeting! After such a day, of course, my phone was ringing when I finally walked back into my office (40 minutes after my duty day is supposed to have ended.) When I picked it up the person calling said "I called you at 8 this morning and you haven't called me back yet!" I had to laugh. I ran full blast all day but it all went really well so I had fun! I sincerely hope all my friends and family are having as good a week as this is starting out to be. ;)

Church Today

2010-01-31T16:46:00.002-06:00

I had a great time at church today. Usually by the time I get home my head gets so full of "what comes next" that I can't remember what the talks were about. Today, I remember some specific impressions. Sister Howell (sp?) made a specific point that we "keep the Lord's commandments" with exactness" Her words made me take stock of my own apathy. I go through the motions but there is no "fire" in my testimony right now. I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is Christ's church with all the keys of the priesthood restored. I know that I, like all God's children, am entitled to personal revelation. It's not that I'm doing anything particularly wrong but watching Sister Howell's impassioned speech lit a little fire under my own testimony, I hope I can fan the flames this week. Next was the sweet feeling of the spirit that attended the talk given in Primary. The speaker was 4 years old and I was struck at the incredible wisdom of having the many jobs that need to be performed in our church community done by "laypeople". Here was this sweet 4 year old girl learning how to speak in front of a group. Nearly from the time our children can speak we begin to develop the skill to stand up before others and share God's word, by the spirit of the Lord. While this little girl was speaking a room full of children were also learning to listen both to their peer and to the spirit who would speak through her. We learn from the Book of Mormon (1 Neph 3:7) that "the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them" Most active members in the church have held a variety of callings (jobs). I've had a family member of mine refer to our leadership as "a joke" because they are not "trained" but over the years I've come to understand just how sweet and wise it is that our bishops are not always "polished" and have rote methods by which to serve. We all have to rely on the Lord to "prepare the way" and we learn and grow so much more in the process. My service in the church is the greatest training I've ever had over and above the university level courses I took to prepare me for my career. I do what I do because I was called to it by the Lord and the most useful training I've had I received in Primary, Young Womens, Relief Society, and Sunday School.

Friends

2010-01-30T12:35:00.003-06:00

Some people collect friends. It is a gift I don't posses. Don't get me wrong, this entry is not going to be a "poor me, nobody likes me" wallow. As a matter of fact, what's on my mind this morning is how well I have done in making good friends despite my poor skills in the area. A couple of weekends ago I spent Saturday morning playing around with paper in my craft room and decided while I did to check out facebook to see what was going on. It turned out that my friend Sue was facebooking at the same time. We got into a 2 hour long chat online. (Doesn't the internet rock!!) We talked about everything from crafts to family to ancestry and our faith. Sue has always been like that. She and her husband Mike used to be our Saturday night card/game buddies when my children were small. We played Pinochle, Spades, Risk, and Trivial Pursuit. Once, we took a trip together to Mike & Sue's hometown in Idaho. We played Trivial Pursuit over CB radios the whole trip! Sue's children were friends with my children so that when we did get together everyone seemed to have a good time. After we moved away from Winnemucca Sue kept in touch. I'm terrible at that but she is always willing to forgive and forget and when we do manage to connect again it seems like we can just pick up where we left off. Sue is the kind of friend who just seems to encourage you to be better.

Sue isn't the only good friend I have, however, just the one with the most history. I'm lucky to have good friends I work with and friends at church all of whom seem to basically forgive my antisocial ways. I'd list them but I'd be bound to forget someone and run the risk of hurting someone's feelings. You know who you are. ;)

Okay Sue, if you are reading this here is the card I made at your suggestion while we were talking. Thanks for the idea.

Change is Good

2010-01-08T19:11:00.002-06:00

Another decade down and a lot has changed since the end of the 20th century.

I am an empty nester.

Some of my children have children.

I finished school.

My best friend is going back to school.

I have a job that I love.

My body does not work like it did in the last century.

We moved to Minnesota.

My son served a mission.

My husband decided against having hair.

My hair decided it is curly - and some of it is gray.

We adopted a cat.

I taught seminary for 6 years

I taught Primary for 2 years

I changed schools (my place of employment) 3 times in 4 years.

Today I spent more than an hour with administrators from our district talking about major changes to take place at the school where I work. I know in my heart that change is good but I can't help wishing next year would be easy enough to skate. But then I'd get bored. Some people are never happy with the grass on their side of the fence.

Christmas in Utah

2009-12-28T11:53:00.008-06:00

We went to PF Chang's our first night in Salt Lake. The trip up here was eventful. We stood in line for 3 hours at the airport and missed our flight. But we did manage to get here in time for dinner at my favorite restaurant with most of my favorite people. Bill had to work and my mom was not feeling well.

Monte, Daevius, & Stephanie.

Ben was SO good at the restaurant

My parents, Reed and Diane Jensen

Xavey and myself.

Anna and Monte.

Derek and Diane.

Brenda, and Xavey.

The food was great. The company was better.

Random Gratitude

2009-12-13T16:43:00.002-06:00

Here are just a few of the things I'm grateful for tonight - this list is long but certainly not exhaustive.

Yesterday we attended our ward Christmas party. It was a breakfast and service project and was more fun than it sounds like even though I was having an RA day. The food was good, the decorations were sweet, and I looked around and realized anew how much I really like those people.

After the ward party AnnaMae and I went shopping at Michael's - serious fun! I bought a bunch of stuff I needed to finish up my Christmas presents. We scurried home by way of the grocery store and got ready for Monte's annual YMs presidency Christmas party. I love those get-togethers. The faces have changed over the years Monte has served as Young Men's President but the laughter and fun has not. The best part is that Fatima has found a new home (don't ask).

I woke up this morning and didn't hurt.

I sat in Sacrament meeting at church watching the young men and their leaders providing that sacred service. Every Sunday I'm struck by what a sweet feeling it is to watch the white shirted warriors reverently offer each person there a chance to renew, repent and reflect.

Monte has built a fire in the fireplace and we are spending the evening watching sappy Christmas movies. There is good food leftover from the party so I don't have to cook. I have a job to go to tomorrow that I love (most days), and I have a vehicle to drive to said employment. We are all set to go to Utah after Christmas to see our children and grandchildren and my husband and mother-in-law (bless them) decorated the house and set up the tree.

Life is still good.

Baby Steps

2009-10-21T21:12:00.002-05:00

I taught kindergarten today. Today is the first day of teaching for me since the MEA weekend (that's Minnesota Education Association) where teachers are supposed to have sharpened their skills. So we spend 3 days evaluating ourselves and a making plans on how to be a better teacher. I fretted. In addition we had a new student coming with particularly high needs. I got so stressed out I gave myself bad dreams for 2 days. So, today while I was singing and dancing with the kindergartners I realized just how much progress we have made in only 14 days of school (they go every other day). On the first day of school I had one who dropped to the floor of the bus and steadfastly pretended to be asleep. He not only refused to get off the bus he refused to even open his eyes or acknowledge anyone. This behavior persisted until 10:30. In the meantime, another student kept pulling the stuffing out of his pullups and eating it. Today, Mr. Sleepyhead walked off the bus and spent the first hour of the day in his mainstream classroom. True, he didn't participate much and spent some of that time rocking with his eyes closed but he maintained an upright position and no one had to "help" him move up and down the hall. Mr. Chewy is not longer wearing pull ups at all, he didn't pull the threads out of his sweater and eat them, and he took my hand and danced with me during circle time. All of my students can count to 5 by rote and with 1 to 1 correspondence, and they all recognize and write their own names. I know it doesn't seem like much but it's progress and it gives me joy to see it.

Pockets

2009-10-07T20:30:00.002-05:00

Okay, I had no intention of blogging tonight because I have about eleventy other things I ought to be doing but I just have to share my deep thoughts (ha ha). I follow a blog titled "A Dress a Day." Yesterday's entry was about pockets and it got me thinking. They say you can tell a lot about a person by what they . . . have in their closet, throw away, drive . .. I propose you can tell a lot about a person by what they have in their pockets at the end of the day. Today, when I got home from work I had a pretty typical assortment of items in my pocket. There was my I-touch in one pocket and my cell phone in the other, 2 quarters, car keys, a ring of picture cues I use for non-verbal prompts, an Alleve tablet, and a stray wad of brown paper towel, the kind used in school towel dispensers. Now I don't walk around for long with that much stuff in my pockets but they tend to collect things all day long. We had conferences last night so I wore a pair of dress slacks that didn't have any pockets and was nearly crazy by the end of the day from picking stuff up and laying it down somewhere and then spending 10 minutes searching for it because I didn't have a pocket to put it in! Today I taught in the Kindergarten room. At various times during the day today one might have found in my pockets the following items: a "chewie" to keep David (not his name) from eating non-food things like string he pulled from his sweater, a dry erase marker for writing lessons, ball point pen for data collection (now where was that clipboard?), flash drive for ALL that info I just think I can't live without. What I didn't have today was the ever present keychain with keys to the 3 classrooms I have been working in this year so far. Those I left on the table in the basement when I relaxed by the fire with my hubby on Monday. This meant that all 3 of those classrooms had to stay back locked and every time we left them we got locked out and had to go get someone to let us in - What a pain! Ah well, tomorrow is another day.

A New School Year

2009-10-03T18:03:00.005-05:00

One week before school started this year I was placed on the SLIP team at school (School Learning Improvement Plan). The team is charged with reviewing the learning goals made by the school community last year, reviewing progress toward those goals, and creating new goals to present to the staff at school so that they can make their plans for how they will meet those goals. I felt a little clueless but the school needed to have a special education representative on the team. ANYwhoo, in the process I discovered that the lead special ed teacher at our school, the person who had been the sped representative on the SLIP, had accepted another position in the district and would be leaving Madison. Two days later the principal at Madison called me and offered me her position. I stressed out for about 24 hours and then accepted the position. What if means for me is that I will be teaching Kindergarten Centerbase class on Monday, Wednesday, and every other Friday and will be the "Elementary Contact" teacher for the special ed team at Madison on the other days. I was pretty intimidated. It is a very long story, but the last time I had a job that put me in a position of authority it turned out poorly for me so I was REALLY nervous. On the other hand, I reasoned that this is a staff I have worked successfully with for the past 4 years and it would be a great opportunity to develop some new skills. It is also something that will look good on my resume. Since Anoka-Hennepin School District will be closing 7 elementary schools and 1 middle school at the end of this year there is a high likelihood that I will be looking for a job.

So far, I think I made a great choice. I'm really loving my job this year. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed teaching kindergarten. I have 4 students with significant needs but we have a lot of fun. They have made progress already! In the other position, I seem to be doing scheduling and paperwork all day and it is kind of fun. I'm still covering the caseload for the EBD teacher because we haven't filled that position yet but the up side of that is that these kids are familiar to me. Life is good.

The Last Huzzah of Summer

2009-09-27T16:32:00.004-05:00

Derek came to pick up the kids on August 20th so we went to the Renaissance Festival on the 21st. We all had a blast. It was a beautiful day.
Daevius made a wand.

We met lots of mythical creatures.

The kids went to church with me the following day for one more visit, and they went home on Monday=(

Let's get caught up.

2009-09-27T15:02:00.010-05:00

September is nearly over and I am just getting around to recording some of what this summer was like. The phrase that keeps running through my mind is "it was the best of times, it was the worst of times. A little melodramatic, I suppose, but it seems to fit. We had a wonderful time. Having Xavey and Daevius with us gave us an opportunity to get to know them in a way that isn't possible in the brief visits we have had up to this point. I discovered that I am not as patient as I thought I was, but the kids got to do many, many fun things. I had them attend Adventures Plus (a school age day care program) while I taught summer school.
I actually about broke even on it financially, but the kids made friends and had 2 field trips a week. They went to 2 water parks, the Elm Creek Park Reserve playground, the Minnesota Zoo, Nickelodeon Universe at Mall of America, a Lynx game, Brunswick Bowling, Maple Grove pool, Stillwater Boat tour, Cinema Grill, and Circus Juventas.

4th of July - We had our annual 4th of July party. Monte paid the Xavey and Daevius a dollar a bucket for picking up pine cones so that the kids could run around barefoot getting wet and playing.

It was a wonderful day. The weather was just warm enough to make it worth putting out the wading pool and the slip and slide for the kids.

We put up the awnings and cooked some brats and hamburgers. Everyone brought something. As usual the food was great and the company was better.

As for it being "the worst of times". One of my favorite men, Monte's brother Bill, passed away in

August. I have probably spoken before (but not often enough) about how much I admire the men in Monte's family. Let me say that Bill was the epitome of what it means to be a loving father and worthy priesthood holder. Bill was the most welcoming and generous person. When Monte and I got married I suddenly had a big brother. Someone who was ALWAYS available if someone in the family needed something. I miss him a lot! My son, Bill and his wife and baby drove to Minnesota for the funeral. While they were here we visited Elm Creek Park.

Summer 2009

2009-07-16T16:17:00.006-05:00

Okay, despite the novelty of journaling electronically and (wonder of wonders) having someone interested in reading it, I have fallen into old habits. I have kept a journal since I was eleven years old but have a tendency to write faithfully for several months and then forget about it for several months, sometimes years. I always think I have a lot to say. I enjoy expressing myself in writing so why am I so scatterbrained about it? I don’t have the answer other than to say that I am only consistent about things I have actually made into habit. Ah well, the following is a summary of my very busy summer so far:

Trip to Texas

At the end of May, we attended a wedding in Texas. Monte’s brother and his wife (Scott and Sue), who live in Flower Mound, Texas invited us to attend the wedding celebrations for their daughter, Megan, and her fiancé’

Marc. These people really know how to throw a party. It was SO much fun. We shopped and played for a day, there was a shower for Megan at her mother’s sister’s house. The couple was sealed in the Dallas temple after which we had a wonderful lunch and went back to the hotel for a short rest. That evening the reception was held at the clubhouse of the golf course near (almost beside) Scott & Sue’s home. The clubhouse was very nice and the decorations were great. The thing I liked the most was that the families of both bride and groom had compiled some family pictures and memorabilia for several generations and organized these cherished mementos on tables. The message was clear – this marriage is forever. During that trip, Monte and I celebrated our 16^th wedding anniversary. It seemed like a perfect way to celebrate.

End of the year at Madison and Riverview

I was able to conclude my time at Riverview Elementary with a minimum of stress. There is always a flurry of work with students being identified for services late in the year, some students invariably move in at that time of the year, particularly in my field. As the stress of finishing one grade and moving into the uncertainty of summer begins to show on the students, those who have minimal coping skills generally act out and often parents go looking for a “new” environment to give the student a new start. Hence, EBD students are a little more likely than the average to switch schools at the end of the year. We were lucky this year. Any of the students who added at the last minute did so by the end of May so we had time to write plans for them. June 11^th was the last day for student and the 12^th was a work day.

Grandkids

Arrival/Derek, Stan and Anna’s visit

June 14^th my daughter Anna and her friend Stan came to visit. Their plan was to fly into Minneapolis, visit for a few days (Stan has friends in Minnesota) and then drive home with Derek. My son in law, Derek, and two grandchildren, Xavey and Daevius, arrived about 3 AM the following morning. We had a great time playing on Monday the 15^th despite the fact that I tried to find a city park that did not actually exist. We had lunch and did find the Saint Anthony Falls. We scurried home, made dinner, and then went to Monte’s softball game. They kicked “fanny” so it was really fun to watch. Then, Tuesday morning, Derek, Anna, and Stan left and Xavey and Daevius and I unpacked their stuff and began to get to know one another.

Setting up for Summer school

On Wednesday, June 17^th I was required to be at Oxbow Elementary to set up for summer school. Xavey and Daevius came along and were bored senseless. They watched a movie on my little DVD player, played on the playground and ate their lunches all before 11 AM. I met the two ladies who would be my assistants in summer school and was very impressed at how professional and hard working these women are. In subsequent weeks, I have come to be very grateful for these women. We are having a wonderful summer even though the students I’ve been assigned to are more severely handicapped than I usually work with. (More about that later) When I had to go back on Thursday to finish setting up for the summer I discovered that the Adventures Plus summer program opened that day so I dropped the kids off there. They had a great day and I got a LOT more done.

Visit to Bakken Museum

On Friday, June 18^th we went to the Bakken Museum with my sister-in-law, Beth, and her twins, Wyatt and Willa. It was a great trip. The museum is housed in the former home of the inventor of the first cardiac pacemaker and co-founder of Medtronics. The home is amazing with a collection of electricity based exhibits. We had lunch by lake Calhoun and went back up to the museum to be sure we hadn’t missed anything. Daevius was most impressed with the “brain wave” machine; any kind of “video” game being his first love.

A Quick Check In

2009-05-14T19:32:00.002-05:00

My afternoon school is a science and math specialty school. What this means is that the students all make regular walking field trips to the Coon Rapids dam. They also have Junior Master Gardner lessons and a variety of other enrichment programs. Anyway, today as I was finishing up my fifth grade reading group I said to Tim "We'll have to finish this on Monday"
Tim (not his name) said "My class will be at the dam on Monday"
I said "Well dang!"
Tim "No the dam!"
Hmm, Sometimes I wonder if I'm getting through.

As a post script, this student just finished taking his District progress assessments and his scores jumped by more than 20 points! Hooray. I know student progress is a collaborative effort but I feel pretty good about that and REALLY proud of Tim.

I love my job, again

2009-05-06T15:24:00.003-05:00

In the past several weeks my job has given me fits. I have had multiple deadlines and a particularly volatile student reaching crisis status. This student is now permanently in my room instead of in the mainstream classroom. This means LOTS of extra work for me but here is what I've discovered. I really love being able to sort out the tangle of needs and feelings and environmental factors that all come together to be expressed in these behaviors. Today my little friend only needed one "break" during the morning. He worked steadily and was able to invite a friend to lunch with him. He smiled and it did my heart good.

Officially Spring

2009-05-02T19:53:00.002-05:00

Okay, it's officially spring. Monte has cleared off all the leaves. For some reason our trees don't drop them until the green buds come in in the spring. He tilled the garden, and cleared out the flower beds. We planted 3 rows of peas, 2 rows of spinach, some basil, cilantro, parsley, marjoram, thyme, yellow squash, and zucchini and some onion sets. The chives are already about 4 inches high, the rhubarb is producing, the apple trees are budding, and there are teeny tiny purple buds on the lilac bushes! We managed to have 2 "tiffs" while working together in the garden. My husband's comment - "planting makes you cranky" The blue herons have been spotted down by the water and the geese are already settled in as well. I haven't seen a frog yet, but it won't be long. I have seen mosquitos. God's in His heaven and all's right with the world. Happy Spring to all!

A Day in The Life of . . .

2009-04-28T16:20:00.003-05:00

I rolled out of bed at 5:05 this morning and tripped over the cat who had already spent the past hour sleeping draped across my legs. The cat always heads straight for her food dish (whether it needs attention or not) I follow her so that she will know I have checked on the state of her nutritional supply. If the bottom of the dish is showing it requires replenishment and she will not stop tripping me until I take care of that. I filled her dish of course. Then I stumbled into the bathroom to take care of all the grooming stuff we all do - shower, hair, makeup, dress for work. By 5:30 I unlocked the door & turned off the alarm so my Seminary kids could get in without setting it off; loaded a few dishes into the dishwasher, washed the countertops, and ran downstairs to get ready for Seminary. Since I fell asleep last night without doing it I had to choose hymns for my lesson and load the video we used today. I sat and reviewed my lesson until 6:10 when my class finally showed up. We sang and prayed and read Hebrews 11 and talked about faith and promises. The video depicted a young man who was a recent convert faced with the choice of whether to work on Sunday or not. Hebrew 11 promises that the lord will always reward those who have faith even in the face of choices as hard as those Abraham, Moses, and David had to make. The main character in the story chose to reject a job that his family needed him to have. They did not understand. The story was unresolved as far as his job was concerned - he didn't get a job. He did, however, know in his heart that he had made the right choice. He bore testimony of the blessings he was receiving in simple terms of building a relationship with the Savior. A much greater blessing than a job.
Next, I took my meds, prayed with my hubby, and spent a few minutes putting together my stuff for the day ahead - namely computer, paperwork, and lesson plans. I had to iron my clothes before I left the house this morning because I realized when I looked in the mirror that they looked a little like I was wearing a used grocery bag. Got on the road by 7:35 but since the drive to work takes about 45 minutes on a good day I was 5 minutes late today. That's okay, at least I didn't have any early morning meetings this morning. By 8:25 I was already deep in conversation with another teacher about a student who has been having a particularly difficult time.
At 8:50 my students started trickling in for their check-in. Jeff always waits in the office for me (names are all changed) because he gets into too much trouble if he is in line with his class. He came in this morning and informed me that there are way too many days left of school before summer break and couldn't we please cut out some of those. Before I could respond to that Paul, and David came in from the bus. Paul wanted to be allowed to go line up with his class and could he PLEASE just be given another chance. So I gave Paul a pass. David, on the other hand had tried to run away from his classroom no less than 5 times on Monday so he and I needed to have a conference. He has a helper who comes in to keep track of him but the helper has been someone different every day now for 3 days because we haven't been able to hire a permanent person yet so I needed to introduce him to today's "helper" and review the plan for the day so it would go better than yesterday. Bob and Don came in next. They just got their charts and went on their merry way. David and his helper were still debating about where to go next. Jill and Anna came in with their helper to have their faces washed, teeth brushed, and hair combed. By 9:10 my room was blessedly empty and basically quiet (I'm across the hall from the gym - how quiet could it be)
9:20 Today I taught social skills with a group of first and second graders. I walked around to each of their classrooms and picked them up and took them to my little classroom. We talked about "What bugs you about school?" and "What can you do about it?" David and his helper attended this lesson. All was well David stayed for the next lesson as well.
9:40 Picked up 4 kids for a reading lesson. One of them needs to work on math instead. We read about Polly the parrot and learned about number arrays as a means to counting in one to one correspondence. David did well and earned a play break.
10:10 I dismissed 3 kids to go back to their classrooms. David did not want to end his play break but after some serious putzing did. I picked up the next group of kids and David went back to his classroom. By 10:15 David was back kicking and flailing. We got him settled into an activity and I attempted to teach the next group how to read. I have to say that Anna did pretty well considering that David spent 15 out of our 30 minutes together being seriously oppositional. But, eventually he settled down, David finished an "apology of action" and we made a deal that he could go back to his classroom . . . if.
10:40 I had a conference with David's case manager. By the time I got back to my room at 11:00 David was in the principal's office having been "escorted" there after kicking his teacher and running down the hallway trying to get away from his helper. (Gusty sigh . . .) The decision was made at that point that David would spend the rest of the day in my room and his case manager's room after I leave the building.
11:10 My fifth grade math students came in for their lesson (fractions oh joy!) I really enjoyed their lesson. David was given some spelling to work on but he jumped up and grabbed a book off the shelf spending the next 30 minutes looking at that instead of doing the spelling. As the fifth graders were leaving the school social worker came in to invite David to his lunchtime friendship group. I was sorry to have to tell her that David was not ready to come to this group until he had finished his work. David finished the assigned work in 10 minutes... hmmm. Then he went off to his friendship group with his lunch. He seemed to do well during the group and worked quietly when he came back to me while I answered numerous e-mails and tried to work on an IEP. The paraprofessional (i.e. helper) came back for David at 12:20 and I packed up and managed to get out the door by 12:30. Since my lunch started at 12:10 this wasn't really good news. I ate potato chips and diet soda in my car on the way to my other school, arriving at just in time to have a meeting with the special ed team and the tech people regarding accommodations for special ed students while taking the MAP tests this week and next.
1:30 5th grade reading
2:15 4th grade writing
2:45 5th grade writing
3:15 5th grade social skills - We played "What would you do" I taught this lesson in the classroom to the whole class. Everyone recorded something that someone else had done that really bugs them, wadded the paper up and threw it into the middle of the circle, and then we all picked up a new one. Then we opened the papers up and took turns reading the "problems" and talking about it. My student, Adam, is autistic so many of the "problems" that came up were things he does that he is not aware are offending (really bugging) his classmates. We had a chance to answer the 3 big questions for choosing a course of action. One, is it a big deal? Two, can I handle it on my own? Who can I go to for help?
3:35 Dismissal. I checked in with my 4th graders. All was well.
3:45 I wrote 2 PLEPS (Present levels of progress) for students I teach, and worked on an IEP that is due on Friday. Then I started this blog entry. When the custodian poked his head in to clean the room I looked up and realized it was 5:30.
I packed up all my gear and headed for home, stopping on the way at the gym for a quick torment session, and arrived at home shortly before 7:00 PM
Then I had dinner (seriously hungry after having potato chips and pop for lunch), cleaned up the kitchen, studied my seminary lessons and finally finished up this blog entry. It is 20 minutes to 9 and I am SO ready to put on my jammies and veg in front of the tv until I fall asleep but I still need to see if I can get that IEP a little further on its way. I probably should have been doing that instead of writing this but I have to believe this could be more important in the big picture. Now I have a record of an average day in the life of... Jan, grandma, Ms. O - whatever.

Too long

2009-04-25T10:51:00.002-05:00

Okay, it's been way too long since my last blog and here is the reason. I have my little notebook that I write my thoughts in hoping to find the ultimate thing to blog about and it never surfaces. Then I find myself looking at a 4 week old blog thinking "It looks like I fell off the face of the earth" and so I just dive in and write something.. Well here's a synopsis of my life since March 28.

April 2 & 3 - I was sick as a dog. A belated gift from my grandson.. Thanks Ben! I promptly shared it with Monte. He still hasn't shaken it off. I'm perfectly healthy now though :p

April 4 - General Conference: We watched it at home on the satellite and had some company to watch with us. The Sorrels joined us. It was so much fun to have them at our house. Devin and Dillon are always entertaining. My prayers are with Mahna this weekend after her surgery.

April 9 & 10 - 2 days off work for Easter. We had the Welkers at our house for Easter. What a great time we had! They are like family to us, we hope they feel the same way. I made petit fours and Easter egg braid (bread) but I'm too lazy to post the pictures right now. The big surprise is that I made bread and it turned out! The Easter bunny brought me a basket full of chocolate, but I shared it with him so we are even.

April 14, 15, 21, & 22. We had MCA testing at both schools. I spent all day testing with basically no prep time. I had a substitute to teach my lessons for the first and second graders while I was testing 4th graders.

April 17th I had Kindergarten transition meetings (very short) and was completely stoked to have the rest of the half day to work on the multiple IEPs I am in the process of trying to write. It didn't happen. I stressed out major including losing sleep and you all know that I just never have insomnia. Spring has sprung and along with that comes the rush of last minute kids being identified for special ed services, teachers reaching their limits as we are faced with high stakes testing, and last preparation for summer. Along with that the kids and teachers alike always begin to be just a little more high strung as a long break from school approaches. Teachers have multiple deadlines and planning to do along with anticipation of the break. Kids often get anxious about the uncertainty of having a change in their routine. We tend to think about summer break as being wonderfully free but the reality is that it can actually be a stressful thing for kids. Especially if things are strained at home for any reason.

ALSO, I talked myself into working summer school again.

So, boring as it is, if this blog is simply my journal I've done my duty by it.

Ben's Visit

2009-03-28T20:08:00.010-05:00

This is little Ben Oelkers. He kindly brought his parents to Minnesota to visit us. We had a great time. Ben's mom and dad, Bill and Stephanie, are pretty fun people to be around. We had a party for which they worked hard preparing food and making the house nice. Monte's family came for the party. As we were planning it I realized that the last time most of these people had seen Bill was right after his mission. They hadn't met Stephanie or Ben. On Saturday, Grandma got to babysit. We went to church on Sunday and had a barbeque (none of the pictures of that turned out - Grandma is technologically challenged.)

Paperwork

2009-03-24T15:56:00.002-05:00

It is time to turn in the paperwork on kids who need to have special ed services during the summer. It is a process that ought to be simple but, somehow, never is. Everytime I think I've got it right I find out there is something I forgot, did wrong, or has been changed. I can feel the gray hair popping out all over my head!

Staffing News!

2009-03-10T16:01:00.002-05:00

*One note - if you are not interested in the "whole magilla" the big news is in the second paragraph. I documented for documentation sake.
It's spring. For a relatively new teacher that always means the "staffing stress" comes on. Every spring public schools look at what children will be attending school for the following year and how many teachers will be needed to teach said children, taking into account (of course) budget issues. I have now taught school for 5 years. My first year of teaching I taught an all day, every day, Kindergarten class in the Minneapolis School District. That was the 3rd year of a 3 year budget cut plan in which that district had to reduce their budget by 90 million dollars! My little school closed at the end of that year so I needed to move on. Knowing that the district had teachers who had taught for more than 10 years in that district who did not have positions for the following year I did my job searching primarily in other districts. I was lucky, I was hired in the Anoka-Hennepin district for the following year but the position was a split. I worked half time at Madison Elementary and half time at Morris Bye Elementary. At the end of the year when the "staffing stress" came up I was dropped from both positions because I had been working on a "provisional" license. I was still finishing the schooling required for the EBD certification. Madison hired me back but Morris Bye found someone who was not on a provisional license. The next year I worked at Madison and Evergreen. Evergreen's numbers dropped at the end of the year so my position at Evergreen was eliminated which meant that both positions were gone because they were offered as a package. Madison hired me back the next year and Riverview picked up the other half time piece. THEN (joy of joys) Madison and Riverview both had a position for me for this year. This has been the first year since I got my teaching license that I haven't been job hunting from March to August. I have completely enjoyed repeating a year in the same two schools, especially since in the Anoka-Hennepin district being offered a contract for a 4th year of teaching gives me tenure. That means that even if there aren't enough special needs kids at one of my schools to warrant my position the district is reqired to find me a placement (which I have to accept or go job hunting again). BUT it means job security.

Here's the news. For the past 4 years I have worked at one school in the morning and then driven to another school for the afternoon. I've had to juggle 2 sets of staff and 2 caseloads. My caseload at each place is smaller, but it can easily become more like 2 full time jobs if I am not really careful. Yesterday, the principal at Madison (remember, my old stand by that has always hired me back) came into my room and started talking about staffing for next year. I thought "Oh boy, here it comes" What she was trying to tell me was that the numbers of EBD kids at Madison has increased this year enough to warrant a full time position at Madison for next year and would I like to take it? Woo Hoo Just think of it. No hauling myself out of the building in the middle of kid crises, no juggling 2 separate conference schedules. I'll know the kids on my caseload before summer break so I can begin next year with a plan!!! Parents will be able to find me when they need to discuss something. This may sound like a possible negative but believe me it is not. When a parent tries to get ahold of a case manager and that case manager seems unavailable the problem escalates exponentially out of sheer frustration. Okay, there will be a couple of things I'll miss. First, the sped teacher at Riverview (there is only one besides myself) is wonderful and really great to work with. I'll miss her a lot. Second, I'll have to turn in this nifty laptop computer that all "transient" teachers get. Oh poop. Ah well, I'm sure I'll cope. Hee Hee. One school, one position! Hooray hooray.

Spring Break!

2009-03-05T17:19:00.002-06:00

It's Thursday already of my spring break! I can't even believe it. I haven't done anything exciting. I cleaned out the pantry, did some paperwork and have spent the past 2 days sitting at my sewing machine. I'm making a new temple dress. I went shopping this afternoon just to get out of the house. I wandered around JoAnn Fabric until the trance set in. I can't believe how many projects I can decide to start in one tour of a fabric/craft store. (I went for thread) It was terrible/wonderful. So, of course, I had to run to the cake store because wandering around JoAnns reminded me that Easter is rolling up fast and I want to make . . . You get the picture. But I'm back at my sewing machine. I think I'll finish one thing before I start a new one - don't you think that's a good idea? You know what I noticed? It was downright warm today. I had to take off my coat. I'm told, however that we have another snowstorm coming. It was fun while it lasted though.

The Party's Over

2009-02-23T16:06:00.002-06:00

Well, the Saint Francis "Branch" has folded up it's traveling tent again for the year. We had fun. We attended Sacrament meeting in our stocking feet (some of us that is) because people are so completely polite about preserving our floors. I'm ready to stop preparing a lesson EVERY day of the week, but I'm really going to miss having these people come to our home. I guess we'll just have to find an excuse to invite them all over again. We held our own "linger longer" yesterday and shared some really tasty food and even better company. The kids got excited and played just like they do at the chapel (I was glad to see it. It means they are comfortable). We took some pictures but I'm going to clear it with some people before I post them here. I'm a little hypersensitive about people's right to privacy.

When the cat's away . . .

2009-02-17T15:55:00.002-06:00

Okay, I know I've said this before but I'm going to repeat it. I'm a child. Most adults know when to eat without being told, go to bed when they are tired, finish their homework. Even many children know how to do this. Monte is out of town until Wednesday and I'm REALLY tired today. Since I just finished a 3 day weekend I can't claim I'm overworked. The reality is that I got so excited that no one was around to tell me to go to bed that I stayed up sewing until my shoulders and back were stiff and my thumb will not move. I forgot to eat dinner last night until I came upstairs and found the sandwich I made for lunch still sitting on the counter. Not that missing a meal or two will hurt me but you'd think anyone with my obvious love of food would have remembered to take a dinner break. It could have something to do with the diet Mountain Dew I drank while I was sewing. Because I spent most of yesterday closeted in my sewing room, I also didn't do the lesson planning I should have done for today so I've been "flying by the seat of my pants" today. Something that works briefly but won't work for a second day in a row. My new pajamas aren't quite finished yet, though ... Maybe I could sew just a little longer. I don't have to cook dinner tonight either - there's still that sandwich. I can't wait to get home!

St. Francis "Branch"

2009-01-30T16:39:00.004-06:00

It's happening again. The northernmost members of the Anoka Ward of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints are hereby invited to attend Sacrament meeting and Gospel Essentials class at our home! This probably seems like an odd invitation and I'm here to tell you that it wasn't that Monte and I took it upon ourselves to have services at home so we wouldn't have to drive into Anoka. This is something that our bishop decided last February might be a good experiment. It was fairly successful so we have been asked to do this again. It was great fun last year. We moved the furniture in the basement and set up about 20 chairs, Monte built a fire in the wood burning stove, and we set up music and all the other props. We called on the members who attended to contribute with prayers, testimonies, talks, and of course the appropriate ordinances performed.

We are all ready to do it again (well, I wouldn't say ALL ready) but I get to teach the Gospel Essentials class (I think that's what Monte called it - I get confused because I keep hearing it referred to Principles, Essentials, Basics ...) Whatever, I get to do it and I'm excited about that too. I don't exactly remember from last year whether the week we started was also conference week but that is what is happening at my house. I will work from 8 am to approximately 8 PM 4 days in the next week. Add to that that the middle schools are holding meetings to "transition" 5th grade special ed students to 6th grade which is middle school here, and this all means late nights, LOTS of paperwork, and some stressfull (even tearful) meetings. Middle school is as hard on the parents as it is on the kids. On Tuesday I went to bed grumping at my poor husband about how I'm NEVER going to be able to make our house presentable. By Thursday I had come to the conclusion that the Lord planned it this way. We'll do what we can and the rest is up to Him. This way I HAVE to prioritize and make it about His message not my pride. The best part about the whole thing is that a Sacrament meeting in the intimate setting of a person's home strengthens those feelings of love and welcome. That is what is the most important part of it to me. The Gospel is about people not places. I'm grateful we have a home that can accommodate such an experience and I pray everyone will feel welcome and loved. See you there!

Check in/Check up

2009-01-20T15:46:00.004-06:00

Just a quick check in for anyone wondering if I've dropped off the face of the earth. Rumors of my untimely demise are greatly exaggerated. I had a rough weekend. By Thursday at 3:30 arthritis in my foot hurt so bad I couldn't put any weight on it and driving a manual transmission vehicle home was an adventure in torment but I made it. Friday I took the day off work and spent it in bed, contacting doctors and feeling sorry for myself. Saturday was a little better. Monte presented me with a big stick to lean on so I could get around the house a little bit. I've always wanted my very own wizard's staff. I'm keeping it - I can think of LOTS of uses for a big stick (a variety of quotes come to mind). We collaborated on the laundry. Monte did the hauling and I did the folding. I couldn't make it to church on Sunday - just couldn't walk that far and this makes the second Sunday in a row that RA has kept me from going to church. I hate that - I REALLY don't like to give myself an out; it is too easy for me to start making excuses and in the end I feel worse after missing a Sunday, but I really was in no shape. Monday I spent milking it a little because I didn't have to work anyway and I was happy for the extra day to baby myself. Clint and Serena came and cheered me up- bringing some really stellar cookies. The upside is that I have further proof from this that my husband is a gem. He cooks! He even cleaned and brought me stuff - and built a fire in the fireplace. What a lucky woman I am!! I'm pain free today - WooHoo! I'm still going to the doctor on Friday.

Favorite People and Unsung Heroes

2009-01-13T15:40:00.003-06:00

Awhile ago I blogged about mothers and I left a few people out. I need to talk just a little about one of the great blessings in my life. I am blessed with several mothers. The lady in the picture is my father's wife, Diane. Technically she is my "step-mom" and I always refer to her as Diane instead of Mom. This is to avoid confusion not because I don't consider her my mom - she is. A mom is someone who takes care of you, rejoices with you, worries about you, knows when you are hurting, forgives you when you are obnoxious, and most of all teaches you. These are all things Diane has done for me. Diane is a "kindred heart" for me because we share many common interests. She taught me to sew and to love it. She loves to read, like I do, and we often share favorite authors. Diane is the one who makes sure I get family history info and pictures. Think about what a great blessing it is for me to know that my children live within a 30 minute drive of 2 grandmothers and one grandfather who would do just about anything for them if they were in need of help. We are all a pretty independent lot and sometimes don't call or see each other for months at a time but my dad and mom in Bountiful are always understanding. If you are reading this, Diane, thanks, and I love you.

I titled this blog favorite people and unsung heroes, so I'm not finished yet with people who should be recognized and frequently aren't - mothers-in-law. Like step-parents, mothers-in-law get a raw deal. I've been blessed with 2 genuine precious gems. I'll begin with Monte's mother, my current mother in law. Anna Mae has the sweetest, most generous heart of anyone I know. She is the matriarch of a family of headstrong, opinionated, amazing people. One thing that will never be in short supply at an Oelkers family gathering and that is different points of view. Anna Mae binds it all together. It takes confidence and competence to be a part of the Oelkers family. Maybe some of that came from Monte's dad but I have to say that Anna Mae has taught these people to know their own value and to share it with others. Anna's my mom, too. But best of all I consider her my friend. I could hope as much for my daughter and son-in-law.

Last in the "mom" lineup I'll recognize my first mother-in-law. I was 18 when I married my first husband and I was probably a real pain as a daughter-in-law. I cringe when I remember what a moody, anti-social little turd I could be. Wanza was REALLY patient with me, even when we moved in with her for 5 months! Wanza was always close by. She was the kind of person I could feel comfortable asking for advice and she gave it straight from the hip without any judgement. She taught me to love flowers because she had a beautiful garden in a postage stamp sized lot. Wanza passed away a few years ago. I hadn't seen her or spoken to her for years but I still think about her sometimes. She is missed.

I Resolve

2009-01-04T13:33:00.003-06:00

I dislike the cliche' of setting New Year's resolutions so I vowed several years ago not to do it again. This doesn't mean that I don't believe in self examination and setting goals. I just believe that it shouldn't happen once a year and then be forgotten by February. So here I am with a perfectly legitimate recognition that there some things about my behavior that need work and it happens that these realizations were brought on by the introspection that comes from the closing of an old year and the beginning of a new one (the definition of a New Years' resolution, I believe). I've been taking inventory for the past several days and listening to the promptings of the Holy Ghost and I've come to the conclusion that the Lord has been telling what I need to do for weeks through my sweet hubby. As I thought about it Monte, who seldom criticizes me (basically because I respond poorly to it), has been giving me the same sage advice with increasing frequency: "Smile"

Today I resolve to smile more.

Okay, to quote John Bytheway "Oh my pitiful goal!" What kind of a goal is it to simply smile? Well, setting measurable and obtainable goals for other people is what I do for a living and I'd like to discuss just what might be entailed in seeing that I smile instead of frown.

Objective 1: In order to get a sincere smile on my face more often I am going to have to pay closer attention to my health. I excuse the scowl on my face by recognizing that my body hurts a great deal of the time so (poker face that I'm not) it shows on my face. Hmm, I'll bet a lot of this pain can be dealt with by eating healthy foods, getting more exercize (raising endorphins), and seeing the doctor regularly and then doing what he/she tells me to do.

Objective 2: My friends and family make me smile. I can and will make better connections with them. I'm a recluse. I use the excuse of my busy life to justify how often I pull away from people. Then I'm sad and lonely when I feel invisible, but I've created the situation. I can and will spend time with friends, get out of my comfort zone, follow through when I feel prompted to call someone. I can and will contact my mothers and father and brothers and sisters and children more and let them know that I love them and think about them often. (Don't think too hard about the fact that I put mothers -plural- I will explain later.) I also want to get to know more about my ancestry. These people who are the root and soil of who I am. I've been blessed in recent years with more information about them and a desire to investigate. Doing that will put a smile on my face.

Objective 3: My gifts from God make me smile. I love my work. I feel that I'm good at it and it is incredibly rewarding to me. This is a gift from God. The skills I have with children who hurt come directly from God and this is my true calling. I take a paycheck home because the school district pays people to do what I do, but I'd do it without being paid (don't tell District 11). Most of the people I work with are incredibly loving dedicated people. This is also a Gift from God. Another gift from God that is mine is my creativity. I'm descended from some true artists. My father and brother are talented artists. I'm not a true artist, just creative, but creativity is the power of God. What is it that the Saviour did? He created the earth and all that is in it. My creativity is a miniscule portion of that great power and it puts a smile on my face. I'm going to respect and nurture that creativity in all the forms that it takes.

Objective 4: I can unpack, unload, and destress. I noticed something wonderful about my son and his wife. They smile and laugh a lot. They don't seem to take themselve too seriously. I have always taken myself way too seriously, and I'm a funny person - especially when I'm not trying to be. I can let go and let God much more than I do.

Objective 5: My relationship with my Heavenly Father and my Saviour make me smile. I can open the door for the Saviour by being a better Seminary teacher, studying the scriptures for myself as much as to prepare a lesson. I need to spend more time on my knees talking to my loving Father in Heaven. I need to spend more time listening to the promptings of the Spirit. I feel peace when I take the time to read the articles in the Ensign and the New Era, when I attend church meetings, listen to the counsel of the local church leaders, and when I do as the prophets have asked. These are things that intertwine themselves with all of the other objectives I've written about. These will be the actions that make all the others possible.

"My Soul shall be joyful in the Lord: it shall rejoice in his salvation." Psalms 35:9

I wish for all my friends and family a happy, healthy, and prosperous year, but most of all I wish for you to smile!

My Trip, My Family, My Oh My!

2008-12-31T08:00:00.009-06:00

Our Christmas trip to Utah was a complete blast!

Tuesday - We got into Salt Lake just as it started to snow, went out to lunch and went Christmas shopping. I'm not sure I've ever been shopping on the day before Christmas Eve in any city other than Salt Lake City, but let me assure you it is not really indicative of the "joyous season". There were NO parking spots anywhere and at least 2 cars in front of you waiting for a car to pull out. For weeks we have been hearing about how depressed the economy is and how merchants are so concerned that people are not shopping. What, exactly, were all these crazed people doing there, then? Anyway, once we got a parking place and trekked a mile through slushy snow the battle was half over. People didn't look like they were having fun! In the end, however, it wasn't a big surprise that people were rushed and cranky so we persevered and got the shopping finished. (Sort of) We even laughed a little about the slush and grumpy people. You may be asking why we waited so long. That's a reasonable question and I'll tell you. Did you know that it costs money to check even one suitcase on an airplane? Our 3 small bags cost a total of $55 each way.

Wednesday, Christmas Eve - Monte and Bill went skiing in the morning. I slept in! After a little more wrangling over Christmas shopping the real fun started. We went to Bill's house for a traditional Danish Christmas celebration. Bill and Stephanie cooked all the traditional food (Yum - they do a nice job) and then we danced around the house holding hands and singing. (Picture Monte and I skipping and holding hands - okay stop laughing now.) Ben thought it was great fun. He laughed like crazy until the end when we all cheered and it scared him. We sang carols, read the story of the Savour's birth from the book of Luke, and then opened presents. All of my children and grandchildren were there. Thank you, Bill and Stephanie, for such a sweet memory.

Thursday, Christmas Day - LOTS of snow on the ground, coming down from the sky, and flying around. Our drive back to the hotel in Draper the previous night had been scary so we got up wondering if we were going to be able to make it to Bountiful to visit my dad. I pouted a little and Monte agreed to try it. It was the weirdest thing. By the time we got to Midvale the roads were clear and there was no snow falling! I can only conclude that God has a sense of humor and all that praying Monte had been doing for snow so he could ski had resulted in the snow falling down on our heads. The Christmas/Dad's Birthday celebration at my dad's house was as fun as always. We had an unexpected blessing. Monte and I showed up on time and were there nearly an hour before anyone else! We got first crack at the food (Yum again!) and sat and visited with Dad and Diane and Rian (my brother) until everyone else arrived. After lots of visiting and eating we opened presents. Diane, bless her, has encouraged my interest in family history. Last Christmas she and Dad gave me 2 bound copies of family history from Dad's side of the family. This year they had a packet of pictures to go with those books. I monopolized my dad for awhile to get him to give me names and details. After a brief rest back at the hotel, we went to see Bedtime Story with Brenda and Derek and the kids. It was cute and funny in fairly typical Adam Sandler fashion - without the crude humor that REALLY bugs me. Not stellar, but entertaining.

Friday - No skiing today. The snow had now covered the valley and the roads to the canyon were restricted. We slept in, putzed around, went to Provo for lunch with Bill, Steph & Ben. Then we putzed some more, took a nap, and went to PF Changs with a BUNCH of people. I invited Mike and Sue (long time family friends), Brenda, Derek, Xavey, Daevius, Anna, and Anna's friend Stan. PF Changs is my favorite, so of course I had a blast.

Saturday - Monte and Anna skied all day. I went to Provo again (to drop off forgotten presents) and then up to Bountiful (same reason). We went to dinner at Outback with Anna.

Fun trip. My only regret. I didn't see enough of Brenda and her family.

Snow! Snow! Snow!

2008-12-09T15:56:00.002-06:00

Okay, I love snow. I love how quiet the house gets in the middle of the night when it is snowing and the power goes out and the TV shuts off and my husband can't just turn it back on again. I love the way it hides all of the brown left over from the color-burst of autumn. I love the way it sticks to feet and mittens and hands and gives you an excuse to really enjoy being warm inside your clothes or your house. I love the way it smells - like all the odor in the world has taken a holiday. I really love snow days, too, but we didn't get one today. School was in session. Kids are great on snowy days at school. They get louder and rosier and walk faster. You almost NEVER hear a kid groan and say "Oh no! It's snowing." Here are a few of my favorite snow memories.

The first winter after my sister and I left Bountiful where we lived with my father and moved to Lake Tahoe to live with my mother we had one snow storm that dumped so much snow on us that the 1st floor windows were covered with snow. I still remember how eerie it was to open the curtains and see nothing but snow. That same winter the snow got so deep that we could step off of the second floor balcony onto the snow in our back yard. There were actually people who could not find their cars.

I remember taking Anna and Brenda sledding in Winnemucca, the time Brenda and her friend Amber launched themselves off a jump. Amber didn't want to play anymore after that. Go figure. Brenda was game though! I wonder if she remembers it?

I remember skiing at Alta with my kids and my new husband and his brother who came to visit from Taiwan! The kids were so impressed to see Monte flying down the hills with icicles dangling from the ends of his mustache.

Once, I walked to the bus stop in Sandy, UT to catch a bus to the UofU. The bus was late, got as far as Sugar House and then slid off the road and could not be moved. We all got a transfer and an offer to catch the next bus that came along. Some of us decided we'd rather go to lunch - and did. No classes that day. I found out later that the teacher had not shown up either. She was stuck in the snow.

Now, I have to go drive home in it. That's okay, too.

The Notebook

2008-12-08T15:54:00.002-06:00

Don't get excited, this is not a post relating a heart wrenching love story. This is my own personal ramblings. I have a little notebook that I keep in my purse. Whenever I have a few minutes I pull it out and write down random thoughts, experiences, memories and then I decide later if I want to take the time to expand those ramblings. Here are some things from my notebook in the past few days.

Thanksgiving - We went to Paul's house and I decided that Monte's family is much easier to get along with than some families who shall remain nameless. (Don't assume I mean you!) Paul and his wife, Peggy, and their children and numerous cats have rented an old farmhouse complete with a barn for the cats. It's a wonderful place.

The Gingerbread Party - the day after Thanksgiving I had my nieces and nephews and grand nieces and nephews at my house for a gingerbread house decorating party. I have many pictures and will be adding a more comprehensive blog about that some time when I am not just sitting in my office waiting for all of the buses to pull out of the school parking lot so I can go home.

The Sabbath following Thanksgiving - I wrote 5 pages during sacrament meeting (yes, I was listening to the speakers) about the terrific people in my life. This is another topic I really want to explore in more depth maybe in this blog, but certainly in a format for my children to read sometime. I'd like them to know that I realize how blessed I am.

Then Work, Work, Work - Progress reports were due Friday at one school and today at the other. Special ed progress reports are different than report cards so, despite the fact that I (maybe) have fewer to write each one can range from 1 to 3 full typed pages. Also, Seminary, Seminary, Seminary.

Friday we went and saw "Twilight", Hmm. I liked the book and the movie was fairly true to the book. Not exactly on a level with "The Notebook". There was a gaggle of adolescent girls with a couple of mom-types in the bathroom afterward going on and on about what a great movie it was. I guess I missed that. Monte was a good sport about it but his only comment was "weird". Nevertheless, when the other books are made into movies I'll go see them. I'm a sucker for the big screen and the big popcorn bucket!

Saturday - I had Katie and Stacy come for a sewing lesson. Oh my goodness, I had fun. They are so excited to learn and didn't groan or anything when I made them take notes and review fiber content of thread. They must either be really polite or kindred spirits in the sewing room.

Saturday Eve - We had our YM's Leadership Christmas party - My husband is a good cook. LOTS of work even though we tried hard to make it simpler this year. The work was more than worth it because it is all about actually spending quality time with people who work hard all year on behalf of the young men in our ward. They deserve any and all perks we can show them. Besides it is just fun to have adults sitting around my table visiting. (Monte and I don't really count as adults - ask our kids)

Monday Blahs - one high point. I was teaching a lesson in a 3rd grade classroom on respect that went like this.

Me: Okay, how do we show respect for what our teachers are teaching us?
Student: We shut up?
Me: Well, being quiet is a beginning what else could we do?
Another student: Keep our mouths closed? (I'm sensing a trend)
Me: Okay, but what do we do with our ears?
Yet another student: Wear earrings? (Do you think I'm losing them?)

Well, the buses are gone and I'm scheduled for another sewing lesson - Woo Hoo! Have a great one!

Auntie Flo

2008-12-04T17:14:00.000-06:00

Okay, this is fair warning. I need to rant and this will not be a subject my husband is going to "get". I'm not shy about it but consider yourself warned. This post is about my Auntie Flo. If you do not know who Auntie Flo is or if conversation about that unwelcome relative falls under the heading of TMI (too much info) STOP READING NOW. I'm going to begin with a baby boomer check. Does anyone remember the episode of "All In the Family" where Edith Bunker forgot to stuff the turkey at Thanksgiving because she was so upset that Auntie Flo would no longer be visiting? She was convinced she was "no longer a woman". Not so this woman. For the past 2 years Auntie Flo's visits have been either vicious and unending or non existent, unpredictable ... yada yada. Last year she was so unpredictable that I carried an emergency change of clothing "just in case" in my car. The doctor assured me this was normal and a precurser to that "dear lady's" final demise. I was ecstatic! Auntie Flo has not visited since the beginning of last August and I was really thinking our relationship was at an end. Mother nature is a witch with a sense of humor - she's laughing at me. Today I as I was getting ready for work I thought, "Well I know it's past September but I'd really like to wear those cream colored pants today so I can wear this sweater with it - it's cold outside after all" Then I went on my merry way. Guess who came to visit all in a rush as I was standing in front of a room full of 1st graders! I made a dash for the bathroom, fending off people along the way who wanted to "talk" about this or that. Usually the teacher's bathroom has an emergency box of pads for teachers to dip into in a pinch. It was there - empty. Okay, ask the nurse. She provides emergency supplies for the occasional 5th grade girl but, of course, what she had to address my plight was for when Auntie Flo is a gentle little thing - it didn't hold out too long. As soon as I was finished with my groups I headed for Target. (Remember it takes the better part of an hour for me to drive home) I bought the first pair of black jeans I could find and a bag of "emergency" pads to keep in my car. By the time I got to my afternoon school my britches looked like the opening scenes of a CSI episode. I ran into the building and straight to the bathroom with my coat on and clutching my Target bag in front of me. Nothing is quite such a relief as getting cleaned up after an episode like this. Today, I'm especially grateful for Super Target and credit cards. Auntie Flo is NOT a welcome visitor in my house and I think I know who is to blame. As I was leaving my afternoon school to come home today I counted no less than FOUR pregnant teachers. Cute little moms with their round tummies-phahh!! The estrogen is probably floating around in the air messing up my ban on Auntie Flo.

Early Christmas Here, too

2008-11-26T09:57:00.000-06:00

Well, Monte and Jan must have been very good this year. Santa has delivered two round trip tickets to Salt Lake City to visit our children and grandchildren. I know I said that this trip "just didn't cover it" but I didn't mean that the way it sounded. Besides, I was afraid we weren't going to be able to make it this year - grounds for depression. The point is that I seem to be able to have my cake and eat it too this year (a cake decorator's favorite euphemism). I get to have a gingerbread party with the Oelkers' clan and then go to Utah and make every possible effort to completely spoil my grandchildren. What could be better? Also, we have been coveting a flat screen TV for years. Santa delivered a 40" TV last night. Woo hoo.

A holiday memory

2008-11-21T13:44:00.000-06:00

One of my sweetest Christmas memories is Grandma Anna's Christmas tree. My grandmother loved Christmas more than anyone I know. The day after thanksgiving she decorated her house to within an inch of it's identity. She had a huge Christmas tree upstairs in the front window. The room had vaulted ceilings and that room had full length/height windows across one entire wall. This tree she trimmed with decorations she had used for many, many years. We had so much fun looking for our favorites. She had some glass balls that were the size of casaba melons. We thought the tree was elegant but it didn't have a "theme" it was just covered with sweet memories. Grandma also decorated a second christmas tree for the family room. This tree had all the child made, macaroni strung, knitted, and knotted decorations on it- every gift from every child and grandchild, niece, or nephew over 60 years of love. It was also beautiful - in a different way.

Holidays

2008-11-21T13:34:00.001-06:00

For the first time in years I'm getting excited about the holidays. I don't know exactly what has caused this uplift but I'm especially grateful for it. Maybe it has taken me just shy of 10 years to resign myself to not being close to my children during the holidays. For the past few years, Monte and I have gone to Utah for Christmas. Sometimes flying in on Christmas eve and home 2 days later, and I love those trips, but they don't quite cover it. Okay, I know that my happiness during the holidays can't be dependent on someone else's actions, but this is probably why I've been doing the scrooge thing. Anyway, this year I'm excited. I'm planning a Christmas party. One of the things I miss about the Christmas season with my kids is the gingerbread houses we used to build. So-o I've invited all my nieces and nephews to my house to decorate gingerbread houses. Wyatt and Willa (who live next door) have been at my house for the past 2 nights helping me make and bake gingerbread. We have doused the kitchen in flour repeatedly and I'm having a blast.

Men!

2008-11-10T13:15:00.000-06:00

Okay, I know today's title might be loaded. Every woman knows how it goes, right? You screw up your face and think about that male characteristic that makes you want to run screaming for a nunnery. Which is an interesting response from a card carrying member of the Relief society. From the picture at the right one might conclude that my big sport joined in the rush into the wild last weekend as deer season opened. Not so! This get-up was organized for the annual Young Men's paintball get together. Every year he goes out and buys more gear so that everyone will have what they need and the Young Men and leaders all get together and shoot paintballs at one another. Unfortunately, this year there were not enough youth prepared to go so it was cancelled. All dressed up and nowhere to go. Still he's always game. He loves sports! There are certain times of the year that I don't see him at all in the evenings. He has softball on Monday, basketball Tuesday and Thursday, Young Men's on Wednesday, and just maybe we can go out on Friday night, but then it's basketball again on Saturday morning. Then whenever possible, and the weather cooperates, he goes golfing. If he isn't playing he is watching - or talking about it. Then there's the wheels (or if said man is a fan of Garage Logic - cylinders) More wheels, or more cylinders, equals greater happiness. We are happy with a new car. We are happier with a new car with a bigger engine, even better if said car is a truck - a truck with 4 wheel drive (Oh Glory!) Add a trailer, a riding lawnmower, and still he may covet another riding lawnmower that cuts a bigger swath and yet another (because the first didn't turn quickly enough, or have a big enough bag, or mulcher or ...) Then there's the fire. He likes to build a fire or as he puts it a F-A-R. When the flames climb past his height and can be seen from the end of the street he is happy. He patrols the yard dragging wood from every corner and throwing anything else that has been laying around the yard too long (good thing I don't hang out in the yard) He comes back inside the house with his face flushed, mustache and eyebrows crinkled up at the ends and smelling of smoke - the epitomy of the happy camper! That's my man - he can't sit still, can't watch one television program at a time, and thinks filing is making piles on the tables and counter tops. Am I complaining? - Nope. For all that he is also always where he needs to be. He's the one I look for first in the morning and when arriving home from work. He's the person I want to talk to when I'm hurting or happy or scared or excited. He's the priesthood holder and leader in my home and I didn't really understand what that meant until I experienced it. It means that he will be the one who looks out for our spiritual health. I can count on it. He will encourage our progress, pray for our weaknesses to become strengths, and ALWAYS be someone I'm grateful to be married to.

Mothers

2008-10-26T16:43:00.001-05:00

In the picture from left to right - My mom, Brenda, Anna, Me at Brenda's wedding in August '07

Today's lesson at church was about motherhood, the importance of, and the blessings thereof. As I read the thoughts of this little community of bloggers I recognize a recurring theme. Being a mother is a tough, often thankless, task with amazing rewards that sneak up on you. Case in point. My daughter, Anna, turned 30 on the 16th of this month. I was unable to reach her on that day and (airhead that I am) it was several days before we actually spoke. Now a daughter's 30th birthday seems like grounds for a something splashy but as I'm in Minnesota and she is in Utah that didn't happen so I had succumbed to the ultimate maternal right and had convinced myself that I'm a terrible mother. (Bring on the guilt.) My children have turned out miraculously well in the face of the many mistakes I made, and I wouldn't blame Anna if she didn't want to talk to me. HMM. I have GOT to stop talking to myself. That little internal voice just isn't kind. Well, when I did connect with Anna we had such a lovely conversation. She is so busy with her life and so many positive things happening. Anna works hard. She is a program director at a treatment center for adolescents. She is assisting on a research project at the University of Utah. She volunteers at a free clinic for homeless women, and she is the family touchstone (meaning she's the one looking out for my mother and her siblings). Anyway, during our conversation she thanked me (yea that's right) for teaching her so many things. Ladies, this is my expression of hope to you - especially those with teenagers. Your teenagers WILL grow up to realize how often your parenting was right and a real expression of love. Okay, more about my terrific kids later.

As I pondered the motherhood question I had some reflections I'd like to share. Things my mother taught me. My mother always said "It's the squeaky wheel that gets the grease!" Contrary to the unstated taboo against "complaining" this is a truly essential life skill. My experience has been that it is truly rare for anything to be just handed out. If one wants something to happen one has to go out and seek it. I have always been a shy person. It is hard for me to ask for help, but some of the things I have managed to accomplish in life are due to my mother's lesson. Sometimes I have just refused to take no for an answer. She has always treated me as if she believes I am capable of doing anything I set out to. This is a really empowering attitude and I'm grateful she taught me this. This lesson was reinforced by my sweet grandmother's oft repeated "Can't is a coward and hasn't tried!" This "momism" rattles around my teacher brain on a regular basis. Despite my husband's conviction that I'm simply stubborn I get my determination from the women who raised me. There's no cowardice them.. I hope there is none in me.

Bears

2008-10-12T20:25:00.000-05:00

First, thanks for the encouragement in the face of last week's post. I slept a lot this weekend and am feeling better. I've taken up a new hobby - well sort of. Actually I've found an excuse to make time in my schedule to do one of my favorite things - sew. Last spring one of my students lost her uncle to cancer. Her family was looking for someone to make some grief bears for the family and asked if I would be interested (for a fee of course). A grief bear is a bear made from the clothing of someone who has passed away. I let the offer go all summer and didn't hear from them so I figured they had found someone else to make the bears. When school started they contacted me at school. It turned out that my student didn't know my whole last name (a lot of the kids call me Mrs. O) and they had lost my number and, by the way, how soon could I make 6 bears? I had so much fun making these bears and knowing as I did that it would be a healthy remembrance of their loved one. They loved the bears and ordered 2 more. Then as the bears were sitting in my office one of the teachers at the school whose brother passed away over the summer saw them and ordered some bears for her family. My tender heart wants to offer to do the bears for free, but I know I have to place a value on my time as well. Maybe the whole thing is a little morbid, but I know how much it can mean to have a piece of clothing from someone you lost. A bear isn't going to wear out. The school social worker wants me to advertise but I'm afraid. It's like the cake decorating I do. It is worth it to me to do for friends but if I have more business than I can do comfortably then it isn't fun anymore.

Parent-Teacher Conferences

2008-10-08T18:34:00.001-05:00

You may notice that it has been some time since my last post. This is no big surprise - I am a teacher in the throes of parent-teacher conferences. Any parent will tell you that conferences are stressful. Any parent who has attended them that is. I can remember what it was like when my own children were in elementary school. You gather your courage and wander into that familiar, yet all too foreign domain that is your child's elementary school. This is an important environment. Your child spends the bulk of his or her waking hours in this place and these people have a great deal of influence on your child's world. Do I bring the student? Do I dress up? Does this teacher think I'm a dingbat of a parent because my child went to school yesterday with her coat on inside out? Is my child sharing every intimate detail of my home life with the class during sharing time? All of this before you get to the real questions - how is my child doing? Is he learning, progressing, making friends, making mistakes, coping, failing, smiling, clowning... Just what is going on here anyway? I have to trust you people and that is hard for a parent to do sometimes.
I'm now on the other side of the desk. I teach special education. My students ALL have emotional or behavior disorders. Some are autistic, some have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, anxiety disorder, obsessive- compulsive disorders, traumatic brain damage, and a grab bag of other obstacles to progress in school. The parents who attend conferences with me have frequently had bad experiences in school themselves. Most have had battles and fears and tears with one teacher or another because the problems my kids have are often misunderstood. As a special education teacher my job is as much to be an advocate for the child with classroom teachers as it is to teach them. Having said that, I have to say this has been a REALLY exhausting week. I try hard to be at as many of these conferences as I can but they are scheduled around the classroom teachers schedules not mine. This means that I have conferences in different buildings taking place at the same time. I had just such a situation this week and was late for one conference. The mother attending that conference was torqued (my new word this week). I could just about follow the trail of smoke as she made her way to the principal's office to complain about me, my lack of responsiveness to her requests, her child's lack of progress, and the school system in general. All of this lack of responsiveness has manifested itself in less than 4 weeks of working with the child. Oh joy! This principal is (mind you) a brand new principal here -my new boss :o The next day's conferences included the parent who is concerned about her 2nd grader's level of anxiety in the classroom so she is visiting the classroom and holding him on her lap so he will be calm. My dilemma is that I can completely understand both parents' point of view and intentions. I can completely relate. My children will tell you that I'm the queen of expecting kids to be independent but that is NOT my knee jerk reaction to any situation. I've had to work hard to teach myself not to gather them all in and try to make it all better. It is, however not going to be helpful for me to nod and agree. As I write this I am finishing up my last night of conferences and have had the opportunity to meet with the first parent (the mama bear). I wasn't able to tell her that her son's learning "difference" is going to be overcome in a single year of services. That he will be functioning at grade level by next year. I can't tell you how much I would like to be able to say that. I'd love it if I could find some magic formula to put myself completely out of work. But so far I haven't found it and I really do care!

Go Gophers!

2008-09-20T17:09:00.000-05:00

Awhile ago, I'm not sure how long since I wasn't actually listening to him, Monte told me he was purchasing season tickets to the Gopher's football games. The tickets came and we duly attended a game and lo and behold, they won! Last weekend he took our nephew, Wyatt, to the game. Wyatt had a blast. Today I got to go again and I have to say I had a blast too. Those of you who know me very well will probably be surprised by this. The truth is that I know very little about sports. I only understand the bare outlines of the rules and if someone I love wants to watch a sports event on the television I can't help sitting there thinking of how many other things I'd like to be doing. But an event live, a football or baseball game at the dome, or a baseball game featuring the Anoka LDS team, is a different matter entirely. I love the PEOPLE aspect. I get a charge out of the fans. I root for the local team as gleefully as any of them. Today at the Gopher game I saw it all. Lunatic fans with their faces painted posing and posturing for the cameras. Small children in Gopher regalia with no clue what was going on, but generally enjoying the mayhem. The couple sitting next to us were dressed up (for a football game) with jewelry, shoes shined, and creases in their slacks. They sat quietly just smiling and occasionally clapping, leaning toward each other sharing the experience while people around jumped out of their seats yelling, singing, clapping, waving their arms. The couple in front of them spent more time out of their seats than in them. Did anyone complain? Nope. We just watched on the monitors until the couple in front sat down again. They were so cute! They'd jump up and slap each other's hands in the air (what is that called a "high 10"?) anytime the Gophers gained yards, or scored, and then stand there cheering through the next play. Also, the dome is LOUD. There was the band and the cheering, the announcer "It's your M-i-n-n-e-s-o-t-a G-o-p-h-e-r-s . . . ophers . . . ophers!!" people eating and laughing. The place smells great! almost as good as the fair (at least most of the time) I'm a sucker for the smell of junk food . . and the lady next to me had nice perfume on, too. Note to self - go to more sporting events.

Too Busy?

2008-09-14T20:34:00.000-05:00

I have a very bad habit that I'm going to share here in hopes that it will help me purge myself of it. I'm too busy. I work full time and teach an early morning scripture study class in addition to that. My work is such that my 8 hour "duty day" seldom is enough to complete what needs to be finished. In fact, I still have some paperwork to finish tonight, but all of this is beside the point. With all of the things I have to do, I still find time to do the other things that seem most important to me, or that capture my interest at the moment. I decorate cakes, take on sewing projects, watch television, listen to audio books, go out to dinner or lunch with friends, and manage to make an occasional handmade greeting card. I'd like to be scrapbooking, beading, and making gingerbread houses. I'd like to write a book ( I keep making notes - I have 2 notebooks full) Yet, the other day when I received a phone call from my church asking for a minor service I groaned and complained. That service just was not on my agenda. The sweet lady who called me was very understanding and said that if I didn't have time she could certainly find someone else to do it. Then the Lord gave me the prod I needed and I began to feel ashamed of my attitude. (I agreed to do it of course) The truth is that, while my days are certainly full, I have plenty of time to be selfish and I have almost complete control over my own time. When I still had children at home, their needs and schedules ruled the better part of my days. Now I have just myself and Monte (my husband) in the house. Monte does not require nor demand much of my time. He's not the kind of husband that needs to be looked after. In fact, he's a pretty darn good room mate. He cooks, cleans up after himself (mostly), does yardwork, and pays his share of the bills and then some. I have a lot to be thankful for - including the opportunities I have to be of service to others. So-o in future I think I'll try an attitude adjustment the next time someone asks me for something.

Enrichment Meeting

2008-09-11T20:01:00.000-05:00

Wow! This is my very first blog thanks to the Relief Society of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Here's what happened. I belong to this society. It is the oldest and largest women's organization on the earth. We meet regularly and every woman over the age of 18 is welcome! Our meeting tonight was a lesson in choosing lifelong learning and part of the agenda was to help us learn to journal through blogging. The beauty of this answer to personal journalling and writing a family history is that I can share it with others immediately and I can't lose the notebook!
You may, at this point be wondering what you are looking at in the picture. This is the 50 foot tall cowboy that stood outside my family's business for more than 60 years! When the business changed hands, the cowboy was purchased by the city of Wendover, Nevada and placed in this setting as a historical landmark. This is a piece of my childhood.